Ok, so this past weekend at Outback, they talked over and over about how important it is to be in relationship with God. That the more we conversate with Him and read His Word, the more we will know His voice. I prayed that I would know God's voice. That is so important because in the Garden of Eden there were 2 trees... One tree of Life and the other which was the Tree of Knowledge of GOOD and evil... Not just evil. This is dangerous because a lot of times in our life we choose what is good. Just because it is good. The tree was not called the Tree of Evil. So, it is super important to know God's voice so that we know what tree is the Tree of Life. (Just for the record, I didn't come up with that on my own, although I'd like to take credit. Another Outback story) God has proven that to me this week... Ask and you will receive, right? Right. So, I've began to hear Him. And what I've heard Him say is that maybe I'm not supposed to do Souled Out! What?! Are you serious?! I have to do Souled Out?!?!?! But as much as I argued, ignored, insisted on me thinking that was Him and it not being, the feeling of His voice continued and intensified. Ok, I asked God to hear His voice and He spoke. Now I have to obey!! I asked for it, right? Yea, I did. But that is not what I had in mind for Him to say!!!
So, I've been wondering, praying, and thinking about what I am supposed to do instead! Maybe stay home, go somewhere else, what? I have no clue. And Souled Out is kinda like Nicaragua. I didn't pray about it... I just said I was going. I didn't ask to make sure that was God's will for me. I didn't ask Him if that is where He wants me. Maybe He is just making me step back and pray about it. Pray and make sure that is what He wants me to do. Maybe it is. I kinda hope it is. BUT, I know if it's not then there is something better and bigger for me to be a part of. It may not seem better and bigger to me, but I am sure it is to the Kingdom. So, I've learned my lesson on asking and receiving!! I don't want to battle with God. I want to hear Him and obey. No questions asked. But it is a difficult thing to do!! Like in my last post, I want to stay out of His way. I have to die to myself so that He may live through me.
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